Thursday, January 3, 2008

Divide and Conquer: What Every Woman Needs To Know

By Suzette Hinton If you can get in a womans head, you can get into a womans bed. Fact or fiction? Is this a stereotypic belief founded in untruth? Or have we given away our power to opportunists who seek to invade our sensibilities and take over our lives? Though no one knows exactly where it originated, the quote, divide and conquer has been around since the days of Julius Caesar. It is the belief that one can achieve military advantage or power over an enemy by somehow fracturing the whole. Even if the enemy is more powerful than you, you can still gain an advantage if you discover his weakness. Before you react with insult and disdain, lets evaluate this objectively. It is true that women tend to be feelers. We are the ones who can detect if something is wrong in the relationship. Who would argue that women have a sixth sense, a knowing, a more developed sensing ability than our male counterparts. Though this is one of our greatest gifts, in the absence of fact, we often get talked out of what we truly truly sense in our gut. Oftentimes, we are criticized in the workplace and by our mates for being emotional. Who says that just because we cant produce factual evidence, our knowing is nullified? Nevertheless, when challenged, we are more inclined to abandon what we feel. How many times have we so easily abandoned our intuition and later regretted it? Honor your feelings. This is key. When you really esteem your feelings and regard your emotions, you arent so easily seduced by what you hear. A man cant just whisper sweet nothings in your ear and turn your head. Hes got to say more than youre pretty, youre sexy, or he is crazy about you. Your self-love requires more. I often wonder how online predators and scam artists are so successful. I believe its because they have learned to speak a womans language. Or at best, they know what to say that attracts a vulnerable woman. He trusts that if he taps into a womans emotional frequency, he can reel her in. Maybe this is why teenage boys seek good pick up lines or men at nightclubs run so much game. They know or have heard that if they can say the right thing, they can get a private audience. I understand that all guys aren't the same. But you must admit that true character and personal integrity seem to take a back seat. So, how do we avoid predators? I believe, first and foremost, we must respect our womanhood. Denying oneself never makes one stronger. Know thyself. Know thy boundaries. If you are in the early stages of relating and you know that you melt when a man touches you a certain way, limit the physical touching. Its nothing to be ashamed of. When you treasure yourself, you wont expose your vulnerabilities too quickly. Let him prove himself worthy of the privilege of handling you in that manner. Do not drink. No, not even a glass of wine on a first date. Generally, women get intoxicated faster than men. Remember, you have to keep your sensibility. Your goal is to enjoy his company. Have fun. Flirt a little. Approach him from a standpoint of interest and curiosity. Educate yourself about men. Read books about men written by men. Who knows them better? Also, seek the counsel of a male family member whom you trust to help you keep it real. Learn to speak a mans language. Embrace his culture: his way of thinking, his way of Being in this world Youll find that men arent that complicated. The confusion comes when we project onto them our feminine perspective instead of actually receiving them for who they are. What a compliment it is to any man or woman for someone to take the time to really get to know them. This may sound a little old-school to many of you; but, his treatment of you is a reflection of how you regard yourself. Divide and conquer? You have the power to decide. Suzette R. Hinton, SAC-I, Certified Life and Mentor Coach, Counselor and Mother. Graduate of CANA, Inc. (http://www.CoachingInstituteofNorthAmerica.com) and Founder of Purposeful Connections (http://www.purposefulconnections.com). Suzette believes that purpose is not only a destination but it is the energy that pushes us toward its fulfillment. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Suzette_Hinton http://EzineArticles.com/?Divide-and-Conquer:-What-Every-Woman-Needs-To-Know&id=313646 2mg xanax order
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